Home.

This is what Brussels feels like - sadly, I dont have a picture of my mom to put on here, but she's the main reason why I go back home.

Weekend at home

I'm in Brussels at the moment visiting my mom and it feels really nice to be home. People always say 'home is where the heart is', that's probably why I feel at home in many different places, as I love people in different places.
Brussels is a very international city, with lots of people from all over Europe (they call it 'the heart of Europe') and this is perhaps another reason why I like it here. It's very open and friendly, and the chocolates and beers are amazing.
My mum was speaking about getting a dog, since our cat died last year, and I've been looking into 'small-ish' dogs for her. I'm not very keen on small dogs, but she doesn't have the space to have a big dog (otherwise, a husky would be my choice).

I find beagles very cute though. Maybe I'll get one for her birthday in May?

Plans?

I LOVE to plan stuff. anything, everything. I also like to plan to make plans - at night, for example, I'll think about all the things I'm going to put in a list the following morning. Sad, I know.
Lately this hasn't been the case. I can't plan, because I have no idea what is going to happen. I found out last week that I got accepted into my chosen Universities to do an MA (in consumer psychology) - YAY - but I still have so many doubts I can't get properly excited.

Next year is a complete mystery to me - I don't know where I will live, with whom, or what I'll be doing. Technically if I do this MA I can live and work part-time, but live where? Am I going to end up in shitty student halls in a room that doesn't even fit an extra toothbrush?

Thinking about leaving my friends and my flat in Farnham makes me want to cry. I know it's a bit extreme, but this truly has become my Home. Our flat's tiny but us three girls have had such amazing times here..we are the three musketeers. This situation reminds me a lot of when I left the European School in Brussels. I grew up with those people for 10 years, some of them (see previous post) are like family to me. And it was the hardest thing to move to England by myself, but now I can't imagine my life anywhere else. I guess people always adapt, right?

Ah, I don't know, it's just so hard to let go.

After hand-in celebrations

I spent the first weekend away in a long long time. Saw my best friends as they came to Bristol for a birthday party. It's weird, sometimes I "forget" how much I actually care about these people. But when we're together it's just naturally amazing.

I survived.

Finally finally I've handed in my DISSERTATION and now it's over, never to be spoken about again (or, at least, until the grades come back). I finished it off the day before and printed it, bound it and gave it in.. I even kissed it before putting it in the box. 30% of my grade was in my hands.

Finishing such a long piece of writing is strange. For the couple of weeks before the deadline where I really worked on it, I knew that everyday I would wake up, at 8, write, then lunch, then write, then dinner, then write some more. EVERY day. It was quite tiresome but it gave me something to do and now that it's over I hate to say it but I miss it...
Days are spent lying in bed in my pijamas or going to Waitrose to buy ice cream so I can watch gossip girl and modern family, in bed of course. It seems I have no purpose in my life?!
But naturally, I do... I need to find a job, get accepted into the Universities I applied for, sort out my life for next year.
But for now, I'm just gonna stay in bed a little longer.

x

Music

love love this song.

Sometimes I feel like this..

tired and uninspired.

Today was not a very good day, I was at the library from 8 to 8 with my group, which was good because we got quite a lot done for our Creative brief on Colon Cancer (a live brief given by the European Commission), but at the same time I came home late and could not get myself to focus on my dissertation. It's due in two weeks and I have only properly done 5000 words, half of what it should be! I have a feeling there are going to be a lot of late nights and early mornings in the next couple of days.